“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou
You have critical conversations daily, and you may not realize the impact they have on others. Every conversation has the potential to shape someone’s feelings about a topic. Currently, my favorite conversations are with my fourteen-year-old son. As any mother of a teenager will tell you, these discussions can be a challenge. I often apply the same methods I use at work to these interactions at home. We talk about priorities and expectations, weigh pros and cons, assess risks and rewards, and chart the best path forward together.
Active Listening is a skill everyone can use in both their professional and personal lives. Human interactions forge connections, but true connection requires the ability to listen effectively. Some might argue that speaking is the harder skill to master in communication, but I would say that active listening is an art form. When the person you’re engaging with feels heard, you’ve truly mastered it.
Five Tips to Re-Engage Through Active Listening
- Be Completely in the Moment
In today’s world, technology often pulls our attention away from those around us. Notifications on our phones and laptops can easily distract us. Be present and engaged, and demonstrate respect by giving someone your undivided attention. Simple actions like holding eye contact and showing empathy help build trust and rapport. - Be Curious
Asking questions is an art. Use questions not only to confirm facts but also to deepen the conversation. Open-ended questions show you’ve been paying attention and are genuinely interested. Recapping what you’ve learned and asking for clarification demonstrates that you value the other person’s perspective. - Use All of Your Senses
Active listening goes beyond just hearing. Engage all your senses to pick up on nonverbal cues. Are they maintaining eye contact? What is their body language saying? Are they fidgeting or comfortable? Observing these signals can help you gain a deeper understanding of their emotions and concerns. - Give Them the Time They Need
Building rapport and trust takes time and effort. Some people need more time to feel comfortable before opening up about their issues or concerns. There’s no set timetable for this process. Be patient and lean into the relationship, showing that you’re invested in the conversation and the person. - Stay Authentic
“You get what you give.” Building genuine connections requires sincerity. People can sense when your interest is genuine versus when it’s not. Authenticity comes from truly caring about the person and their perspective. It’s not just about the conversation—it’s about how you make them feel.
The Bottom Line
Success in life and business hinges on the ability to truly listen to those around you. Make Active Listening your superpower—it deepens existing relationships and creates a strong foundation for building new ones. Listening is not just a skill; it’s a way to show others that they matter, that their words and feelings are important, and that you are present with them.
Incorporating these tips into your daily interactions can transform how you connect with others. Remember, it’s not just about what you say—it’s about how you make others feel heard and valued. Embrace the art of active listening, and watch as your personal and professional relationships flourish.
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Author: Candace DeFinis